Sunday, April 22, 2007
I can honestly say that I have never been in this spot before. Never. I have never lived outside of the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex. Everything I have known to be familiar and comfortable has changed. Even as I type this, I can't stop the tears. I did not see this coming. I truly felt that it wouldn't be too hard because we knew the Lord brought us here. I know, I know, that sounds silly. I should know better than that! But, wow! My heart is really having a hard time transitioning. I have even cried over the big, gigantic, full grown, oak tree in the front yard at the old house. Only twigs in my yard here. (I'm sure God will speak to me through those baby trees. I am sure I could find some symbolism there.)

Hebrews 11:1
Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.

And this is what I cling to. Despite the lump in my throat from feeling homesick, I still know that we heard right!


  posted at 9:18 PM

At 9:23 PM, Blogger Jennisa said...

Praying for you. Even though I don't have any big words for you, just know that as a woman, and a mommy, every time I have to re-plant my roots into the ground, there is always an adjustment period where I don't feel home. It has always taken me a little bit of time, but please know, I do know how you feel...hugs to my bloggie friend....

At 5:14 AM, Blogger Kate said...

Oh Amanda, I hate that feeling... I am sending you a big giant huge hug. Beautiful things are to come...

At 6:36 AM, Anonymous ArmyofMom said...

To say "I know how you feel" seems just a passable comment, but it's true. I've been there many times having been military and moving frequently. I promise you this will pass. It is AWESOME to read and experience with you your obedience to the Lord's calling. I don't know you, but I have been following your blog for a long time. You are touching lives, Amanda, in ways you don't know. Give those tears, fears, homesick feelings back to God and keep moving forward, girl! I can't wait to read your blog every day to see what God has placed new in your life. This is a journey, and whether you know it or not there are many of us following right along. You're allowed to be sad and homesick. Just don't get stuck in it. I pray for you and this new direction the Lord has placed you in. There is so much good coming. I can just feel it!

"Courage is the power to let go of the familiar."

At 6:49 AM, Blogger Dee said...

((((HUGS))))) and Prayers my dear friend!

At 9:14 AM, Blogger Gwen said...

Thinking of you today and everyday. This too shall pass. It's okay to be sad. I cannot say I know how you feel because I have honestly never moved more than a few miles from one home to the other. I can only imagine how hard that would be. I know that you will get past this period and you will be blessed for obeying God's calling.

At 10:08 AM, Anonymous janna said...

i am grateful to have you in my area code now. thanks for encouraging me--even when you deserve the encouraging.

At 10:22 AM, Anonymous janna said...

i am grateful to have you in the same area code. thanks for encouraging me--even when you are the one deserving the encouraging.

At 1:36 PM, Blogger Kyle Sears said...

Later on in Hebrews 11, the writer says, "All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them."

We all, in a way, are home sick. We live in a place that is not our own. But you guys are striving after the place where God would have you, and while it's never a safe journey, it's always the best one. They are commended for living in faith, even though "they did not receive the things promised." How much more than can we celebrate the Promise we have received!

Together, forward.

At 1:48 PM, Blogger Amy said...

Oh, I know how you feel and I don't miss it one bit. I'm so sorry you're feeling sad. I've been there and I can tell you from experience that it does get better. Cling to what you know for sure...He is Good!

At 5:32 PM, Anonymous Kaukee said...

You have the gift of feeling things so don't question yourself. I am homesick for my heavenly Father's home.....whatever we have to do to get there will be worth it. I will pray for you right now. I love you so much and you will be ok. Don't sweat the little stuff right now Mandi.

At 9:01 PM, Anonymous Kaufee said...

Ok, I have thought about you and your feelings you have described. I prayed for you again and this is what I think after thinking about you for a while. When we are missing something or homesick-we remember what we left or what we miss. We don't remember the sad times or the frustrated times, we remember the good parts. There are times when we keep trying to grasp "back" at the past for the bits and pieces that made us happy. We try to capture those places, times, memories as if they were perfect....if we re-examine those things they were far from perfect. I know you miss a lot of things and feelings but I feel that you might be unsure of tomorrow and wish for the safe yesterday where you knew everything that happened. Mandi, He holds our tomorrows. Living in faith, each day with the promise of tomorrow in Him....that is what it's all about. It is the growing pains, the becoming of age or maturity. It is hard for Josiah at this age to understand that some day he will be a father and have children and grandchildren. There is no way to explain that to him now. There would be so many subjects to discuss with him and it is futile. Explaining your future with God is hard to explain to you.....HE can't tell you all that is planned or cuddle you with safety because there is no way you would comprehend. I feel that so much is coming your way and you say but when it is coming.....remember "are we there yet Mommy" or "how many moons Mommy". CHildren really don't understand the passing of time but we try to tell them with counting moons. Just count the moons Mandi and in several moons all of this will make sense. Lean not to your own understanding but Let Him show you daily. Try to get the manna for the day.....don't try to obtain the manna and hoard it....just go and get it each day. Give us this day our daily to day. Easy, calming, resting in his word daily. He means for you to relax and listen-be still and get His manna just for the day. I hope this makes sense. I love you.


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